Holidays like Thanksgiving in Canada are often portrayed as joyful gatherings filled with family, laughter, and tradition. But for many immigrants and newcomers, the experience can feel very different. When your loved ones are far away, the holidays may bring feelings of loneliness, homesickness, or grief. You might wonder where you fit into these celebrations—or whether you want to celebrate them at all.

If you’ve moved here on your own or with family, the holidays can highlight just how far you are from the familiar comforts of home and your home culture. These feelings of disconnection can be overwhelming and may bring forward thoughts and feelings you have not experienced before.

The Silent Weight of Loneliness

Being surrounded by images of big family dinners, invitations to potlucks, and talk of traditions you may not share can deepen the sense of being “outside” of the holiday. You may feel there is an ache of missing parents, siblings, children, or friends who once filled these days with warmth.

You may be thinking about previous celebrations you’ve had back home and yearn for that connection. You may find yourself reminiscing about celebrations back home or feeling caught between cultures — not fully part of Canadian traditions, yet disconnected from your own.

This isn’t just loneliness — it’s a complex mix of emotions tied to migration, identity, and belonging. And it’s important to remember that these feelings are valid.

Ways to Care for Yourself During Holiday Seasons

If this is your reality, know that you are not alone in these feelings. Many immigrants and newcomers face similar challenges. Many people are unsure how to navigate this time alone. Here are some gentle ways to care for yourself:

• Acknowledge your feelings: It’s okay to grieve what’s missing. Giving yourself permission to feel sad or homesick is an important part of self-compassion. Acknowledge your feelings in a diary to allow yourself to fully express yourself. Writing down your feelings can also how you see how you have progressed over the years in terms of adjustment and finding how you fit into your new home.
• Create new traditions: Try cooking a meal that blends your cultural foods with Canadian holiday dishes, or invent your own rituals that feel meaningful. This can include inviting people over or creating a quiet, safe day for yourself too connect with what you love.
• Reach out for connection: Even if family is far, you might connect virtually, spend time with friends, or join community events. Some community centres and faith groups host holiday gatherings for newcomers. Spending time with others can help be a healthy distraction that fills up our cup.
• Reframe the day: If Thanksgiving doesn’t resonate for you, give the day your own purpose—maybe it becomes a time for rest, reflection, or self-care. Following the “cultural norms” of your environment might not always feel safe or right for you, that is okay.
• Seek support if needed: Sometimes the weight of isolation can feel heavy. Therapy or support groups can be a safe place to talk about your experience and feel seen. Having conversations centered around these feelings can help us better understand what we need to feel more included on holidays.

Holding Two Truths

It’s possible to feel both gratitude for the opportunities of a new life in Canada and grief for the connections and traditions you’ve left behind. Holding these two truths doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you are human. It is also completely normal to feel these two truths differently from day to day. One day you may be grateful to be in Canada. On another day, such as a holiday, you may feel resentment towards your choices and where you are.

As an immigrant, the holidays can feel complicated. They may bring reminders of distance, but they can also be an invitation to slowly craft a life that includes both where you’ve come from and where you are now. Tackling holidays with a fresh, open mindset can allow you to make the most of the day while honouring who you are and your traditions. Stay connected with your emotions and resources, explore possibilities, and do the best you can.

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